Monday, December 30, 2013

Ridiculous Me

i almost lost a friend due to my ridiculousness during this winter break. In my family, celebrations is a serious thing where we will gather and have a meal together. Brought up in a family who value togetherness so much has made my holidays here in Britain quite lonely and nostalgic. On top of that, the fact that i have to study more than anyone else, since i have stop studying for a year, have made me spend my holidays with my books instead with my friends. 

hence, knowing that my close friend in Malaysia is having a great time during the Christmas Eve has made me jealous. Jealous until to the level of getting mad for no apparent reason. more like becoming "a kid in a candy shop", according to someone.
a kid in a candy shop
that is a really interesting metaphor 
ok. thats not the point
so u can assumed i act like the kid. i think it was supposed to be b*tch. but lets just keep this post 'clean'. i was overreacting and have crossed a line. 

this situation tells me that.. i still unable to control myself when I'm mad. i want to be able to react properly when I'm mad. I said things I'm not supposed to say and do things I'm not supposed to do when I'm mad. I believe this can be tackle as in we can be more wiser next time when this happens again. hence, i am putting this in my new year resolutions list!
to not react promptly when I'm mad
analyse the situation thoroughly and only react when i am at my normal state

the next thing is, this also tells me that i am not quite an independent person. being so fragile in a situation and affected by it is enough as a proof. hence another plus one for my resolutions list!
to be more independent

also, living in a cold country makes me crave for chocolates like no one's business. top that with the stress i am having right now with my studies. this results lumpiness at my face. how annoying. haha. hence +1 for my resolutions list!
to control my addiction of chocolates

if i have more time,i'll continue to write all my resolutions for next year because right now i need to get back to my books. "be kind to one and another" - Ellen. lets pray 2014 to be good!

below is my lousy video on Youtube. They are the souls that i have met on 2013. Its just a video of appreciation for giving me support and love. Thank you for being a part of my life