Monday, December 30, 2013

Ridiculous Me

i almost lost a friend due to my ridiculousness during this winter break. In my family, celebrations is a serious thing where we will gather and have a meal together. Brought up in a family who value togetherness so much has made my holidays here in Britain quite lonely and nostalgic. On top of that, the fact that i have to study more than anyone else, since i have stop studying for a year, have made me spend my holidays with my books instead with my friends. 

hence, knowing that my close friend in Malaysia is having a great time during the Christmas Eve has made me jealous. Jealous until to the level of getting mad for no apparent reason. more like becoming "a kid in a candy shop", according to someone.
a kid in a candy shop
that is a really interesting metaphor 
ok. thats not the point
so u can assumed i act like the kid. i think it was supposed to be b*tch. but lets just keep this post 'clean'. i was overreacting and have crossed a line. 

this situation tells me that.. i still unable to control myself when I'm mad. i want to be able to react properly when I'm mad. I said things I'm not supposed to say and do things I'm not supposed to do when I'm mad. I believe this can be tackle as in we can be more wiser next time when this happens again. hence, i am putting this in my new year resolutions list!
to not react promptly when I'm mad
analyse the situation thoroughly and only react when i am at my normal state

the next thing is, this also tells me that i am not quite an independent person. being so fragile in a situation and affected by it is enough as a proof. hence another plus one for my resolutions list!
to be more independent

also, living in a cold country makes me crave for chocolates like no one's business. top that with the stress i am having right now with my studies. this results lumpiness at my face. how annoying. haha. hence +1 for my resolutions list!
to control my addiction of chocolates

if i have more time,i'll continue to write all my resolutions for next year because right now i need to get back to my books. "be kind to one and another" - Ellen. lets pray 2014 to be good!

below is my lousy video on Youtube. They are the souls that i have met on 2013. Its just a video of appreciation for giving me support and love. Thank you for being a part of my life

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Boring Me

i just realised my previous post has a different style of writing than my usual one and i have come to conclude that
ahahaha sorry for that folks

i probably has gone way too focus on the topic or something. After almost 3 months in Sheffield, i can tell that my life has been busy.
busy busy busy
i have morning class from monday till friday. i have laboratories. projects. goodness me. i never felt that i have to perform so many things before and baam! 
I'm feeling it right now

i guess this is how uni life is. the struggling of looking for information, journals, articles. u can say that i am pretty culture shock of the education system here. most probably due to the fact that, during my time in GMI(my previous college), we were sort of spoon fed with ALL the information that we need to know. Here, it is about finding it ALL by yourself. The lecturer is only exposing us or teaching us whatever that is at tip of the iceberg. and i will always remember this phrase
nothing's easy
nothing's impossible too