Saturday, December 22, 2012

What is your Love for?

i only blog when i have this ideas flowing in me. so today's topic will be a little bit about love. AGAIN. ahahahha. i was just wondering
have you ever felt that you've been loved for your money
honestly, i am a type of person who doesnt mind to pay if im eating with my friends. its not that i have so much money of something. i am not that rich but i just spend when i have money. so, at some point, you just feel like, people 'love' you or 'like' you just because you are nice,funny and and frank at times. or its just because you like to do the paying.
shouldnt i be not bothered?
because i just said i dont mind
but
i just feel like i've been loved for the wrong reason
not because i dont like my friends digging my money or something
maybe i've been asking for love by using my money. and that is why people love me for my money, and not for me. this is kinda sad but at least i know i've made a mistake and i should have my new year resolution. 

someone i've been seeing just told me he is seeing somebody else. hence he hope that nothing is going to change or anything. well, let me tell you this. lets not make me hurt you okay.. since we both know, i am going to end up hurting you or leaving you.
i'll be doing the leaving
i am sad but isnt it going to be sadder if i hurt you? 
that is what i thought
to jump in a relationship takes more than just feels right at the moment. you have to foresee if you are able to commit, able to sacrifice, able to take care of the person. tbh, i am not the type where i dont really care about what i feels
ohhhhhh
i do really care about feelings and emotions
if not,i' already have so many ex'es. for me, feelings is the most fragile thing in the world. its so easy to appear. and one cut feels like a thousand cut. i am selfish in the sense of, you love me but i dont feel the same because i can see myself hurting you in the end. 

and this is another story, its just weird someone can play with feelings so easily. its like, you have been holding on with someone just because you love the person's money or the person benefits you in many ways. you might say, you are not playing with his feelings because of some reasons, but arent you playing with yours? 

there are just so many stories in one post. i hope you get confused and yeah. forget all this crap? ahahahah